Rant.

So. These days girls grow up surrounded by media suggesting that they have two options in life. They can grow up to be glamorous, fun and sexy...but ultimately stupid and destined to pursue a career in something frivolous. OR they can be serious, f'ugly and be successful in an esteemed profession.

I know this is a huge generalisation, and there are loads of hot lassies (yeah - I'm Scottish now 0_0) who are successful in law, politics, civil service etc - but we need some in the public eye. Name one sexy, stylish female politician...? Bet you can't.



AND - I'm not talking about attractive brunnettes who wear glasses and slightly tight but still dowdy skirt suits either. You know the types who get captioned with that horrendously pattronising phrase "thinking man's crumpet." Blergh.

Lets get a female triple threat out there. Sexy, powerful and smart as hell. Apply within.

Peace Out.

Passion, Pain, Pleasure

As much as I have developed inappropriately deep feelings towards this man over the last couple of years...and, as much as he has got me through rather a few cold, lonely nights...and, as much as I find this extremely upsetting.... I have to admit  - I'm just not impressed with his latest offering. 0_0

Mr Songz has the right idea in getting woman-of-the-moment Nicki Minaj to feature on the album's first single "Bottoms Up." However, he is completely overshadowed by her brilliance. It's not a bad effort, but there is something about the video which is slightly uncomfortable...he seems to spend the whole time avoiding dancing. If you can't move and your club tracks are average, then there is simply no point competing with the likes of Neyo or Usher, or God forbid even Jason Derulo 0_0.

My three faves are "Can't be Friends" "Please Return My Call" and "Made To Be Together" - These songs are Trey in his element. Dripping with emotion, and showing off his superb vocal range they represent why he has had such staying power and why he is the best at what he does best. But - as good as these songs are - I see no evidence that he has grown or improved since "Ready."

Despite it's mediocrity, however, all is not lost as there will be plenty of loyal fans who will ensure decent sales for Mr Songz and plenty demand for another album. Yet, this was such an important release, and it seems so rushed. Shame.

Gonna play it non-stop though....sorry flatmates.

Peace out.

Are you having a Bubble?

Soooo, the summer is over, the tiny patter of prada feet can be heard around St. Andrews.... and the students are well and truly back 0_0.  I consider myself a local now (I lived and worked here over the summer) therefore I am allowed to resent this fact, and I can legitimately roll my eyes at the queues in Tescos/Starbucks etc.


Over the summer I worked at New Hall, and some crazy person let me reinvent the coffee shop there. So, if I'm honest this post is a shameless plug. Here are 10 reasons why you should come to New Hall, and change where you get your morning coffee.....


(1) It's called "the bubble"


(2) The take away cups are AWESOME.



(3) The prices are cheaper than town AND it's fresh and fair trade every time!


(4) The food/cakes etc are delicious, and again are cheaper than town :)

(5) Christine and Corrine - these fabulous ladies will give you customer service like no where else. By your third visit they will know your coffee preference, name, birthday and shoe size. They aim to please!


(6) If you have lectures in the North Haugh, (or live in Andrew Melville or New Hall (obvs)) it is unbelievably close and convenient. 


(7) THERE IS SKY TV!!! - For all those who can't be arsed with the pretence of reading the guardian in Starbucks.


(8) Variety - With dozens of different syrups there are countless options when it comes to coffee at "the bubble."


(9) Privacy...Coffee dates are the norm in St Andrews. But, being such a small town, how likely is it that someone you know will walk past the window? Embarrassing. Come to "the bubble" and have that awkward first sober meeting without your ex walking past with their shopping. 


(10) Get a cute bubble themed loyalty card and get your eighth coffee free! Find me quick enough and I might be able to give you with a few stamps already....

So go on, get going. 




Peace out. 

Flatmates

Twitter is over capacity. I am bored out of my brains, in fact I am carol borederman....a boreder collie ( god I miss Gavin and Stacey 0_0 ) so I thought I'd tell y'all a little secret. 

I live with the best people, like, EVER.

One of my flat mates is training to be a doctor, she has a "going out for tea" and "lets take a pottery class" side....but she also knows how to let her hair down and dance like a hoe. 

Flat mate number two has insane long legs, could shank any of the girls on top model - but instead prefers to study nuclear fusion. 

We have a super couple. Mr and Mrs perfect. Girl straight out of disney...long flowing hair and sings like an angel. Boy, funny, Welsh and nicest man in the universe. 

Then there is the mother hen. Despite being from Cornwall and having a music taste which involves no base whatsoever. She has an ass like beyonce, and her awesomeness rivals queen B herself. 

Last but certainly not least we have our resident historian. Dark hair, bright blue eyes...dangerous combination. Watch out for her. 

Oh, and there is me. And i'm pretty fly....

We are going to take over the world. 

The Princess and the Frog!

So the other day I managed to find time in my incredibly busy schedule of being a serious scholar... :-s ... to visit my fabulous friend in Glasgow and see the first 2-D Disney epic in AGES, "The Princess and the Frog."

For us twenty-something females the Disney which simultaneously made our childhoods, but ruined the rest of our lives is back. YEY. "The Princess and the Frog" really is up there with "Beauty and the Beast" and "The Little Mermaid" - it doesn't disappoint. The songs aren't quite up to scratch...(god only knows why they didn't get Alan Menken to do the music) but Randy Newton does a pretty good job. There are no instant classics like "Under the Sea" or "A Whole New World" but I will certainly be limewiring the soundtrack when I get a minute.

The long awaited princess Tiana is a great character. She is intelligent, headstrong and beautiful - a fantastic role model. There will of course be some who claim the film is racist (like they do all Disney films) but these claims will be unfounded.  Sure, the film fails to portray the horrific racisim that New Orleans would have been riddled with in the 1920's...but the film is marketed towards tiny kiddies!? Tiana's family are incredibly heartwarming, and they provide a lovely (if not a bit suspiciously Christian) message "you can wish on a star, but that can only take you halfway." Also, spot the superstar cameos from Terrence Howard and Oprah Winfrey :-o

The animation is spectacular; and a refreshing change from Pixar. The firefly sequence was beautiful, and the thing that always strikes me about Disney 2D is their ability to give their characters the most beautiful eyes. Still makes me melt. There are also plenty of amazing sparkly dresses which will have you wishing that the Disney store stocked adult sized replicas.

The best thing about this film however is the humour. Louis the trumpet playing Alligator, Ray the firefly with an unfortunate love interest, and Prince Neveen as the frog all practically had me rolling about the floor with laughter. Hilarious.

Also....Aladdin has competition from Naveen for the hottest prince title... is that weird? Never mind.

It's a Disney renaissance, hurrah.

Double words.

Recently, my flatmates and I have abandoned conventional communication...and instead just repeat the same words over and over until our intended meaning is conveyed.

Pour example...

Are you going out? Or out-out? Do i need to get changed... or are we not going out-out? ..."Out" refers to sitting in a pub, playing pool, or perhaps dinner. "Out-out" means wearing a dress and or heels and ending up in the Union. "Out-out-out" is a term reserved for special occasions like birthdays or end of exams where the following day is usually a write off.

Another frequent usage is in the library... Are you going upstairs? Or upstairs-upstairs? ...We could use the traditional "first floor/second floor"

terminology, but working this out would use up valuable revision brain power. The decision in the upstairs or upstairs-upstairs debate usually has something to do with how many of our collective ex-flames we can avoid. Gotta love living in a small town. (Y)

My current favourite is the word Gay. Now, being a group of liberal, intelligent and (for the most part) mature women - I know it is terrible that we use this word as a derogatory term. But hey, shit happens. When we use the word "gay" ...generally we aren't referring to a homosexual person. We are instead to referring to a man who has pissed us off. To qualify as "gay"... a man must have done at least one of the following things.....

1.) Sent stupid gay game playing text messages.

2.) Disagreed with anything we have ever said or done.

3.) Not liked us back.

4.) Been ridiculously hot, without having the courtesy to know we exist.

5.) Not understood our subtext.

6.) Passed up casual sex. (With us - Not in general.)

7.) Had a girlfriend who is under 9 stone.

8.) Lacked the testicles to make the first move.

9.) Not had an accent.

10.) Generally, not been a vampire.

We have theorized as to why it is so satisfying to label them in this way, and have come to the conclusion that it's probably because it's the last thing these type of men would want to be called.

Now because of our own special use of this word....we have a problem when trying to communicate that someone is actually homosexual. Again repetition is the answer. Mr Big is "gay" ....whereas Stanford is "gay-gay." Easy peasy.

It's the future. 

Avatar

As of Monday exams were well and truly over (wooooooooooooooop), so last night we could finally justify spending a good three hours watching James Cameron's epic "Avatar." After getting over the initial vomit inducing feeling of watching moving 3D images on a massive hangover...it really was a bewitching experience.

Avatar is one of the most - if not the most - visually stunning films of all time. The scenes in Pandora... the forest, the trees and the creatures are irresistibly seductive. Cameron's world is like an entirely purple, futuristic Rivendell (but where the elves are blue and sparkle like vampires.) You become effortlessly immersed in the story, and begin to care about the characters without much hesitation. In fact, Avatar has all the ingredients of an absolute masterpiece. Yet somehow...it just falls short of reaching the dizzy heights of Gladiator, Lord of the Rings or Cameron's own Titanic. It is certainly an incredible epic, and a modern great, but... (not from lack of trying)... it fails to become a member of that very exclusive club.

It's becasue the film simply tries to do too much. Cameron throws in key themes from just about every iconic fantasy epic that has ever been released. We have the dual world/consciousness motif from the Matrix triology, the role of nature conquering destruction from Tolkien, and I couldn't help being constantly reminded of Disney's Pocohontas throughout the whole thing. As if the whole native versus western invader plot wasn't enough to make that connection - they even start asking a tree for advice.

The scenes between Jake and Neytiri are simply lovely, and their love affair provides a nice relief from the action and explosions. But more than anything they are a very welcomed escape from the film's rather painfully obvious anti-Iraq War propaganda. I think most of the audience was already well aware what type of modern politics Colonel Quaritch was supposed to represent - long before he actually used the words "pre-emptive strike." I am all for subtle allegory, but Cameron goes way too far.

If you aren't a massive special-edition-owning film geek who can spot badly disguised recycled themes... and if you haven't been studying the arts long enough to detect the presence of tedious political commentary, then Avatar may be the best film you've ever seen. For the rest of us, film of the year....maybe?....